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What’s the perfect amount of time to have a visitor in your home?
I’m an introvert, you see, and my energy for social interaction starts running low relatively quickly.
This is the most misunderstood thing about introverts: that we’re antisocial and that we hate being around other people.
And while I’m sure there are some people who do feel that way, for most of us it’s about battery power.
Our batteries for social interaction have a low storage capacity, just like extroverts’ batteries for being alone.
Whereas extroverts are recharged by being around others, we get drained and need to take breaks to fuel up.
For us introverts, that means visits to and from friends and family who live far away can be particularly challenging.
What’s your limit?
My family and friends are spread across the western portion of my country, whereas I live in the East (I moved here for university and never left).
The travel for us to get to each other is infrequent and onerous enough that all visits must be long enough to make it “worth it.”
That usually means weeks instead of days.
We are not wealthy people and neither are our friends or extended families, so hotels and AirBNBs are out.
The problem is that my wife and I are not comfortable being sociable or presentable or “on” in our own space all the time.
You know, sometimes my wife just doesn’t want to wear a bra.
I don’t always feel like “chatting”.
While we can comfortably pull it off for a few days, eventually it starts to wear.
This is no fault of the people visiting us or the people we are visiting. I love my family and friends and I cherish the time we get to spend with them. I certainly prefer it to speaking on the phone.
It’s literally just the way our brains function.
When you really think about it, having visitors in your space is quite a significant and jarring experience.
Everything kind of changes:
- Your comfort level and openness
